Hy I am new and scared

Information about how to manage or reduce the severity of BFS symptoms

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Hy I am new and scared

Postby Edina26 on February 3rd, 2013, 2:08 pm

Hy everyone I am si scared I have a lot of anxaity especially in the morning when I am alone....I had som pain in the back of the knees usually when I am at rest and some times my hand hurt and my index finger twitches alot.....I feel like I am shaking all the time ...I have a fear of the worst desses ever like Als .....last time after my workout at the gym I was so tired that someone ask me a question an my word came out slured and I freaked out yesterday happend the same and I started to panic whent home and repeated the same word to see if it comes slured . My hand shake I constantly look in the mirror at my tongue to see if it's atropyed and I constantly have the sensation that my tongue is to big and I cannot talk....today I am afraid to talk because of that I am so scared so scared I went to see a doctor he did some blood test everything looks fine it's just I don't feel find I know I have alot of anxiety but then I am afraid of something else like Als
I am constantly looking for something on my body to see what is ring I feel that I can't enjoy my life anymore
Please some one help me I need someoane to talk to
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Re: Hy I am new and scared

Postby Gerard on February 4th, 2013, 12:37 am

Hi Edina26! :) welcome to the forums.

You haven't provided much in the way of details (your age, whether you've seen a neurologist, how the symptoms started etc) so it's a bit hard to comment. I will say this though - everything you've described can be explained by anxiety, in particular the feeling of your tongue being too big in your mouth is a classic anxiety symptom. Browse the forums, and you won't have to look too far to find many others exactly like you.

Cheers

Gerard.
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Re: Hy I am new and scared

Postby Edina26 on February 4th, 2013, 11:09 am

Hy , thank u for taking your time to respond I am 26 years old and a babysitter everything started with a cold in November I took a lot of antibiotics and steroids for that and for some lump nodes in my neck and I had. Very bad side effects like dizzynes tiredness fatigue etc I've seen 5 gp did a lot of blood work seen 2 oncologists for my lump nodes I did some ct scans head neck and abdomen everything cleen seen an rheumatologist for my pain in knees he didn't pay attention went 2 times in er they didn't find anything ...so know I have a little bit of dizzynes I am tired almost all the time and I frell my hands and legs week ...and something I have pain in my legs .i also have alot of anxiety I was reding alot on google about ms and als and just scared very scared
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Re: Hy I am new and scared

Postby Edina26 on February 4th, 2013, 11:12 am

I am constantly checking for atrophy mussels and now I started with my tongue very scary I am afraid and nobody in my family is lessening and they don't care anymore they think I am crazy
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Re: Hy I am new and scared

Postby aztwitchy on February 4th, 2013, 11:16 am

hi edena sorry to hear you are going through this. first step is to relax and give yourself a vacation for checking for symptoms of bad disease. What antibiotics were you taking? a lot of us got here following after a similar experience. the way your symptoms came on rules out the disease you are afraid of...it doesn't start like that. Try to learn how to manage or lessen your anxiety and you will see some improvements. all the best.
"Health is a state of complete physical, mental and social well-being, and not merely the absence of disease or infirmity." ~World Health Organization, 1948
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Re: Hy I am new and scared

Postby Edina26 on February 4th, 2013, 11:35 am

Thank y for your time really really appreciate.so I started with 10 days of amoxicillin combine with methilpredinsolone 6 day pack I was sick from that almost 2 weeks and then 10 days of ampicillin 500 mg , not that bad but still had dizzynes and alot of depression.and then they gave me ciroflaxin for uti that I didn't had for 5 days but I took it just 3 days I was verry off BC of them and then I read all the side effects from that and get scared every morning that I will paralize or just be seats by the morning all of that in one month in December so is February and I still have dizzynes and I am exosted to find what I have or explain to my husband it family how I feel..nobody listens maybe that's wy I am that scared
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Re: Hy I am new and scared

Postby Edina26 on February 4th, 2013, 11:50 am

And the thing is that I got even more scared when my legs started to hurt and then my arms..and I don't think that is part of anxiety . I don't know what to believe anymore everytimg is just so confusing I have moments when I think I am loosing my mind I just cannot recover and be the happy person that I was ...this is distriing my life
moments am watching my every moment every numbness every word and I question myself if it is normal or not if my finger twiches I just feel out ...i am just horrible and I cannot believe how I ended up in this place .and most upseting I don't know how to stop and regain the trust in myself...i don't wanna start to go to see terapists or take medicine for anxiethy .
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Re: Hy I am new and scared

Postby Yuliasir on February 4th, 2013, 12:29 pm

Edina26 wrote:i don't wanna start to go to see terapists or take medicine for anxiethy .

Then you simply have no chances to regain yourself. Look, high anxiety is a disorder, not something you just imagined or something that you can overcome by a boost of will. just because it affects a will, a judgement, a whole management of emotions, including chemical and physical pathways in the brain.
If you cut a finger, you may not go to ER. If you have your finger cut out, well you may not go to ER but you will lost a finger. Same is for anxiety disorders. if you are able to think rationally, you may not go to terapist and live without meds. if you are writing here in a way like you do, obviously in anxiety too high to live a normal life, then there is no mircale wich can restore your peace of mind other than your efforts. I have over 35 years of expericence living with GAD and I know what I am talking about. You seem to be far out of normal emotional regulation, and that would become only worse, you can trace that on some of our fellows - some of them start with fear of twitches and end up with fear of cold being a symptom of ALS... sad but clear example of what is the other way.

by the way one need BOTH meds and therpaist to get out of the pit like yours. Not EITHER. Without meds you can not stop chemical pumps pumping you with stress hormones.
Without help of therpaist you would not be able to manage emotions by using ratio (because people subject to anxiety disorders seem to have impaired neuronal paths in the brain between amygdala and cortex and so called insula, so they have to learn how to use rational part of the brain to support that part which works 'automatically' in a more healthy people). So this is the same training as a workout - you need a coach even in a gym in order not to spoil your muscles, same for brains and thoughts.
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Re: Hy I am new and scared

Postby Edina26 on February 4th, 2013, 2:37 pm

Thank u so much for responding me ... I know it's sounded bad but the reason that I says that is BC I was too obssesd to go see doctors instead of terapist and blame everything at anxiety and the reason that I sayd that I don't wanna take meds its because it may hide a real symtom if any kind of disseas this is the reason for not taking pain killers the same thing
...maybe I am wrong and maybe its part of anxity ...anyways thank y for your comment I i already have an apoiment with a terapist this Friday and give it a shot.if u almost called me crazy no wonder my husband is going crazy with me:( ..
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Re: Hy I am new and scared

Postby aztwitchy on February 4th, 2013, 4:31 pm

my guess is the cipro messed your system up. many people ended up on this forum with the same symptoms following heavy duty antibiotics...i am one of them too. its going to take time for your system to recover....you need to be calm and patient. work on your anxiety...you will get better.
"Health is a state of complete physical, mental and social well-being, and not merely the absence of disease or infirmity." ~World Health Organization, 1948
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Re: Hy I am new and scared

Postby Yuliasir on February 5th, 2013, 12:40 am

I meant not a painkillers but antianxiety ones.. but sometimes painkillers are also necessary.
Looks like you had not a simple flu because you got through heavy treatment including steroids.
That was of course a stress, and BFS is rather normal reaction ofr such amount of stress. BFS and anxiety disorders are also quite related issues, and sometimes it is hard to say what is a cause and what is a consequence. Please excuse me if I was sounding a but agressive :(( I've seen here young people just killing themselves trying to ignore real conditions... and I also was like that... so it was really a bit of personal pain.

Hope you'd be ok. it is a long journey back and you never would be the same. But you may discover many powers hidden before under press of anxiety. I went through it so I know what it could be a miracle.
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Re: Hy I am new and scared

Postby Edina26 on February 5th, 2013, 8:58 am

Azteichy : I was thinking cipro too but the pain in my legs was there before so I will not blame it to that .
Yuliasir: I realy appreciate everything u said sometimes u need someone just to shake u :) my husband does that everytime but i think when some of the familiar people do that we don't react ...thats wy we look for reassurance at doctors or this site....still have anxiety and i don't know wy every time i weak up in the morning i have a slight panic atac :( this is happening every morning on Friday i was thinking to see an neurologist for my weak hand before terapist...another reassurance:( its really hard when i don't have insurance :(
And the usually question i have a weak right hand espeeacialy my pinky finger i feel like its numb and i keep biting it to see if it's numb, i stiil can do stuff with my hand like it is strong but feels week and gets tired quickly..its strange BC i don't know anymore what is normal or not thanks for reading my crazynrs
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Re: Hy I am new and scared

Postby Yuliasir on February 5th, 2013, 11:01 am

All you feel is normal for BFS and for postviral syndrome, and maybe also as a side effect of strong antibiotics etc. Nothing points to severe neuronal damage at least for now.
People in BFS often have associated anxiety disorders, and for those disorders morning panick, waking up in a jelly like weak condition, in a shaking muscles etc. is very common. It happens because usually on waking up our body can not smoothly regain motor control (it causes so called hypnagogoc conditions: sleep paralysis, shaking or 'detached' limbs etc., panick, bad thoughts etc.) Some people feel like they can not even breath on this edge of awakening (and that was a root of legends regarding vampires sitting on the sleeping person chest and strangling their victims). One of our fellows reports weird optical hallucinations (he says he understands therer is writin of the wall and has double consciouness - he sees what is not existing and understands that it does not exist - quite a common phenomenon in neurology!).

Acute anxiety as a disorder (not as a normal situational anxiety) often dreams in a person till early 20 or 30s, then after some stress it just pos up - and hop! you are another person... I was lucky or unlucky to get that transformation at the age of 6, so till 20 I was already and experienced struggler :))) Doctors say about 1/3 of all anxiety disorder victims have early manifestation, in a childhood... so I am the one :)
Good news is it is manageable, and moreover, it provides (if controlled) some very good features - agility, conscious approach to life etc. So if you'd go to therapist with whom you may make a thrustful medical realtionships, then you'd have a very interesting journey to a world of your own hidden power!
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Re: Hy I am new and scared

Postby Edina26 on February 6th, 2013, 11:33 pm

https://www.dropbox.com/lightbox/home/Photos/Mana
https://www.dropbox.com/lightbox/home/Photos/Mana
https://www.dropbox.com/lightbox/home/Photos/Mana
Hy everyone first thank u very much for your responses , as an update I wanted to go see an neurologist for my peace of mind but I am scheduled in 1 march....long time...:( until then I posted 3 pics maybe somewone have some time and take a look at my hands....since I cannot get to see the doctor earlier I'm just analyzing myself alot and I don't know if what I have is muscle atrophy or not :( my hand are a little better no more twiching and not so much weakness ...I hope so ....and my speech is hm....retarded :) when I have anxiethy but in rest it's normal....so maybe its bc of that :(
Thank u so much for your time ...i tried too look at my husbands hands ( when I can :) but he dosent have them so I'm worried
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Re: Hy I am new and scared

Postby Edina26 on February 6th, 2013, 11:35 pm

And I forgot my terapist apoiment it's on Friday ...will see how it goes
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Re: Hy I am new and scared

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