4 months into twitching, my update

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4 months into twitching, my update

Postby jerry2 on February 8th, 2012, 9:35 am

What can I say... It's a year since my knee muscles started to hurt, 8 months since my 3 fingers on the hand started to hurt and 4 months into twitching. This is my continuation story how I go...

Body symptoms are getting worse and worse although somewhere in december-january there was an improvement. I was taking sedatives for a month, the better area did overlap with using them quite a bit but not entirely. "Hard" twitching came back about 10 days after stopping for example and the night tremor was allways there (so was everything, but somewhat less)...

The tremor at night is still there every day if I sleep long enough (longer than 5 hours). Today for example I lie in bed at night, couldn't sleep at 5 AM any more and I was awake. My both arms and hands started to tremble slightly, like there was some electric current going through them. It lasted for about 10 seconds then both hands suddenly stopped for a second or two and started again and it continued until I fell asleep again. Like some motor nerves ringing.

At day I still have some wierd sensation in my hands, mostly left, but they do not have tremor if I do not put some pressure to muscles.

Feet are the worst. The pain has gotten better for some time but now it spread from inner arch to the whole foot again and my right ankle now also hurts on the inside and to the heel :-( This is the worst time for my legs, although the nerve "ringing" in the right foot stopped for now, the left inner arch is still constantly twitching, but I can still walk normally, but I have pain in doing something (even walking).

My twitching is back to worse now, that means I feel popping around the body all day and it is not so concentrated on the left side any more. For the first time I had "5 hour attack" of the right front of the upper leg twitch, beating faster than every second. I am not sure if this is allways so but I did notice now that when I have a "heavy twitching" in one area like this, like the other twitches are gone. I am not 100% sure but felt like it. I can "test" this theory only when one of the muscles is beating very fast, but I have a feeling that there is "only one" twitch in one moment in time in my body at one time. Not sure still... and what does this mean.

The arm numbness was gone for few weeks and now it is back. It is not constant and it happens mostly when I lay down and sometimes during the day, my handsa and legs fall asleep way to easily. I stil have to vivid dreams, feel tired all day and I have nighmares many nights.

My 3 fingers are a little better at the moment but I now have even worse forearm pain (outside region) that cripples my lifting even more :-( But the pain moved a little it seems. Wrist stil hurts and the "atrophy" is still mostly the same although my fear sees a little bigger dent I think in 4 month it should not be questionable if there was some atrophy it would be much worse. I don't think it is atrophy.

Physiologically... as you all remember my coming to this board shaken with ALS fear... Although I am in worse shape, I have somehow "worn out" for now. I am from 100% down to some 20% ALS fear. It is still there somewhere, but I can do other things, I am not constantly thinking about ALS any more. In fact I rarely think of it. But it is like the disease has lost it's name, not it's power. I am troubled by the things that are happening to me and the "nobody know why" burden. I cn make no plans for the future as if this will go to worse every month I will be in wheelchair in a year. Maybe not of ALS, but it is getting progressively worse, mostly the pain. The ALS power has burnt a little down, not because I am so good in managing it, but because twitching is not any worse. If I will start tongue twitching, I know I'll be at 100% again :-(

I have been seeing a therapist, he thinks this is all from my emotions. Of course he does, he is a psychotherapist after all. He thinks I sleep too tight up and that is the reason for many of the muscular pain. He thinks love and pain are just the oposite parts of the same. He didn't put me on any medication. He is a psychiatrist, but he is a little wierd ;-) He doesn't believe western medicine very much (ok for cancer, prevention etc. yes, but not for this wierd stuff)... He told me I am thinking to rationally all my life and I have much anger and fear inside me. I've been around 7 times now, we talked a lot about my past, my mother, my wife... He sees much emotional burden in my heart and he teels me the twitching is just an expression of the anger I can not express. I don't know.

But it seems western medicine can not help me. That is the reason I didn't go to EMG yet, as it will not tell me why I have problems. Maybe I go if I started to twitch more, but for now he told me I should keep away from the doctors because they just bring back my anxiety. I got the rheumatology results, I have no rheumatinsm although it was suspected (they just scared me). I do not want to be scared for nothing with EMG. I know this is my decision and I do not know if this is the right one, but for now... I stick with it... I tell to myself, 4 month of same twtiching all over and in my foot, I should feel weaker by now if it was The disease. And I only feel in more pain, not weaker.

I am planing to try Chinesse medicine and I have appointement at the end of the month with some Chinese specialist. I am also considering manual therapy (some form of chiropractice that is popular in Russia)...

I don't know where to go further or how to ease the symptoms. I fear I'll go from the anxiety I had because of ALS to something even darker (is it possible at all?), to depression that it is all hopeless. Ok, I don't know what the disease is called and what is really making it but it is scarry to me what will happen next.

I do try day to day to stay afloat and not let my mind think for the worst. Most days I do success this month. But the pain and twitching is still there although I am not concentrating and exhancing it, I let it go.

That is my update. I know not much positive news, but I am still alive and my anxiety has dropped a little as you can see from this post and from november when there were posts like: I am almost 100% this is ALS. My heart is stil not 100%, but my rational me is seeing way to much sensory stuff and pain and CNS stuff like tremor that this can point away from ALS. Today somebody told me I could have MS. I don't care. I just want to feel "normal" again, that is.

Thank you for all on this board who have helped me in the past, especially chrissy.

See you

Jerry

UPDATE: I have gone to doctor named phisiatry, it is not ortopedic (ortopedics here is more for surgeries) but it is for bones and muscles, more like phisiotherapy doctor. We don't have podiatry in Central Europe countries. Anyway, he has a shoe shop and he sold me a specialy crafted orthontics (don't kill me because of my spelling now), but he measured how I walk and look at my feet. He is a doctor although he doesn't have ordination any more, he has a special shoe shop. But I assumed he still has the knowledge. I have so wide feet becaue my horizontal arches are flat not the vertical ones he told me. I put too much preassure on big toe and on the heel, the computer showed him. I asked him if my walking is so bad that can cause me this kind of pain and so much, he told me no. He examined my feet and of course he can not xray me, but he told me my feet look fine and my ankle looks fine, there is no swelling, my sucles seems to be working... He told me I may have plantar fascilitis and I asked him: 4 months??? He told me, hmmmm...

I am in a state that psychologist say "learned despair". Even if there is something wrong phisicaly with me I won't go to doctors any more. They either say everything is fine or scare me something is suspicious. I can take thiws no longer. For my fingers and knee I went to orthopedics he told me this is wierd pain when I bent it should be when I walk in this muscle. I told him, well, wierd, but what is wrong, he told me: I don't know. He sent my back to xray and they found erosion and suspected RA or AS. I waited in uncertanty 2 months to get the results I don't have this disease. The rheumatologist told me this is not rheumatic pain that I should go to neurologist. But I already went there and he told me fingers do not hurt me because of the nerves. But nobody here is taking whole picture I think, Western medicine is great for face reconstruction, bone transplants, operations (they saved my boy's life with appendicitis when he was five). I am not putting them down. But there are many problems this approach can not either diagnose or heal.

Yes, I do wonder if this can really all be psychosomatic. It is so hard to believe it is. Like you say, if I can do this to myself, what could I do with positive energy?

And yes, I do have much emotional problems in my life, I've not got proper input when I was a child (no nothing major like sex abuse but little things, overprotective mother and father that was "absent" in his mind, mother was a "control freak" until I was like 14 to say it not in a nice way... I do have problems with my wife and marriage. I think psychotherapy will help me deal with this issues.

But I am still unable to believe it is "just that", just emotional pain projection into the body for the last 7 years.

I do triy to believe that twitching, tremor, pain, tingling, numbness is somehow connected. Because this means I do not have anything I will die of, there is not such disease that does have all this symptoms. But it has to be connected in some way. Although the left foot twitches more than the right and the right has more pain it seems twtiching doesn't make me have pain. I have forarm pain and I rarely twitch there. My both arms are trembling for 4.5 months and the right seems fine, so the pain is not from tremor also. I still have to believe everything is connected, that the mind and the body really are one...

The psychotherapist told me to stop thinking with my brain and start feeling the emotions. He told me go to the wood and yell. I felt stupid but I did. I brought a walkman with me with the song that I choose to be me and my wife's song when I proposed her and some more songs. I fell into such pain and anger and uncontrolled yelling and crying that lasted for an hour. It was really wierd experience and I realised I do have a lot of bad emotions in me, but my left brain is so powerfull I burry them.

Problem is with this yelling and crying my twitching got worse not better and my pain got worse. This happened 2 times in the last week (I had 2 such experiences once at home when I was alone in the house). So much emotional pain, you couldn't believe.

And yes, 1/2 of this pain is coming from the physical pain I am experiencing for 7 years, all the twitching, trembling... The other half are other unresolved issues I have. At one moment I was yelling: Kill me or leave me alone, but don't hurt me with so much pain and problems in my body, I can not stand it any more...

So it is hard to believe it is only from my mind, as the body problems are like 1/2 of my bad emotions. But hope is all I have left and sometimes it seems to be slipping down into the depression.

i realised depression is just another side of anxiety :-( When in anxiety you struggle, you fear, in depression you really don't mind any more, you feel so empty and alone it hurts as much as anxiety. I can not imagine living like this for the next 20 years.
Last edited by jerry2 on February 8th, 2012, 11:03 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: 4 months into twitching, my update

Postby johnnythejet on February 8th, 2012, 10:00 am

Jerry,
You have been through a lot and whether or not you realize it….you HAVE come a very long way. There really isn’t much I can say that will help right now because I know this mindset you are in isn’t something you can just snap out of in an instant. I have no doubt that over time you will get past this and one year, 2 or 3 down the road you will come back to this great place and post your success story. :)
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Re: 4 months into twitching, my update

Postby plainslady on February 8th, 2012, 10:24 am

Jerry,

I too think you have come a long way. I also can relate to just wanting to know what's wrong. I feel the same. When I'm left without a definitive physical diagnosis I'm left to assume its all psychiatric, which quite frankly scares the hell out of me. If this is what we can manifest with disfunctional thinking and handling of emotions, imagine what we are capable of if we were better able to control our thoughts and emotions!

Keep on going, Jerry. You aren't the only one who puzzles the doctors and despite that you have come a very long way.

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Re: 4 months into twitching, my update

Postby BobDownSouth on February 8th, 2012, 10:52 am

Hi Jerry!
I'm 7 months into twitching (legs being worst, then some in arms, neck, occasionally face, eyes). For me some days are better than others. I have periodic stiffness in feet, ankles, knees, hips and fingers. My elbows and shoulders hurt too from time to time. I have had all the ALS-related tests and have been told I might be in an early ALS stage or have BFS. Like so many others here, I have been running scared.

The good news from what I read about your case (as in mine) is that symptoms seem spread over your body and vary getting better and worse, then better and worse again and so on. I have been told with ALS, things tend to get worse with few if any "get betters" in between.

Please keep us posted. This forum has helped keep me sane. Hopefully, it will help you too.
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Re: 4 months into twitching, my update

Postby jerry2 on February 8th, 2012, 11:13 am

Thank you for your kind words, I have written update (see the first post in the topic there is update in the bottom, didn't tell everything before). I don't see myself that I have gone a long way, I think I may be more depressed and despaired than ever (body problems are worse, my emotional problems are not solved yet), but other days I try to keep up. In reality, the symptoms got worse, but there are no major new symptoms that would scare me again more that is why I am less anxious). And I have been worn out, I've read everything about ALS, everything about neuro diseases, everything about meditation I could find, breathing etc... I have spent so much time looking if my tongue is twitching or not (when I put it half way out it is trembling, is it twitch or just tongue tremor I don't know), so I stopped looking it, I don't feel tongue twitching so I say to myself it is not. I have spent so much time looking at my palmar dent etc... I have no energy left to worry at this point. Even if I do have ALS on the end, there is nothing I can do about and there is nothing I am missing and nothing anybody can do about it.

But yes, I am proud I go to psychotherapy, I wouldn't go for no money a year ago...

nd I will try Chinese medicine and manual therapy of this Russian doctor. If at least ONE of my body problem would go to better, it would really lift my spirit.

But one thing is for sure, not thinking about sinister disease connected to twitching doesn't stop it (the twitching). So I don't think I was enhancing it with thoughts. I know when I will be ok: when I will be able to close my eyes hard and open them or yawn and my right eyelid would not be twtiching for 10 seconds like crazy. This is the sign I still have this "devil" inside me...

But what can I say, the doctors told me this kind of morning tremor doesn't exist as a symptom, so... it must be from my brains then somehow. It is better they do not know then to tell me this is sign of some xyz fatal disease.
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Re: 4 months into twitching, my update

Postby jerry2 on February 8th, 2012, 11:19 am

BobDownSouth wrote:Hi Jerry!
I'm 7 months into twitching (legs being worst, then some in arms, neck, occasionally face, eyes). For me some days are better than others. I have periodic stiffness in feet, ankles, knees, hips and fingers. My elbows and shoulders hurt too from time to time. I have had all the ALS-related tests and have been told I might be in an early ALS stage or have BFS. Like so many others here, I have been running scared.

The good news from what I read about your case (as in mine) is that symptoms seem spread over your body and vary getting better and worse, then better and worse again and so on. I have been told with ALS, things tend to get worse with few if any "get betters" in between.

Please keep us posted. This forum has helped keep me sane. Hopefully, it will help you too.


What kind of tests did you have? EMG? Stength tests? I have not heard ALS presents with so much sensory problems and pain like shoulder/feet/ankle/knees pain.

Yours

Jerry

PS - Ok, I have looked at your story. You even had EMG and the doctor told you it is ALS or BFS 50:50 ;-( Maybe that is why I don't want EMG :-( But yes, if your legs are better, they are not better after ALS set's in. And from what I read, you do not twitch constantly any more? I mean 24/7 everyday?

I was better with twitching when taking sedatives, but this is no way to solve problems. The psychiatrist told me that proves twitching is not from ALS. In fact tremor and numb extremities (as you also have) are a NEGATIVE sign for ALS as far as I know. I won't check any more, I don't want to get so scared again. But I believe 6 months is the limit to see fasciculation before weakness in those rare cases that present with fascics first. Not 5 years... I am counting the 2 months, not 4 years 8 months. That would kill me. I don't want to believe it. ALS kills you before 5 years, you can not just twitch for 5 years and then get weakness.
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Re: 4 months into twitching, my update

Postby mwagner on February 8th, 2012, 12:21 pm

Jerry,

Your way of thinking is very logical and I'm so glad to hear that your fear has lessened to 20%. That's so great. I think that your doctor is right - if sedatives lessens the twitching, then the twitching can't be caused by something sinister. I know that sedatives do the same for me (I take xanax once a week - if not for the addictive properties of xanax, I would take it more often, but I'm too scared of addiction). Sedatives relax your muscles as well, but I am sure if you gave them to a patient with &LS, they wouldn't make a difference, because the muscle twitching has a completely different root cause than what we're dealing with.

I am sorry for all your pain. I think it may help to see how Chrissi progresses with her therapy.

And, honestly - I don't see a need for an EMG for you, honestly, unless you experience weakness at some point. The reason so many of us have had them, even though we don't need them, is because we're scared and we want some sort of confirmation. And, even then, we wonder if we got them too early, if they were done correctly, etc.

Thanks for your update and keep your outlook strong. 4 months is a good milestone and 6 months will be here in notime. In fact, lots of doctors have 3 months as their milestone for twitching prior to weakness, so you're past that!

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Re: 4 months into twitching, my update

Postby BobDownSouth on February 8th, 2012, 12:41 pm

Hi Jerry!
I guess you read my story on this site. Pain in muscles is not a typical ALS symptom but stiffness and cramps can be either ALS or BFS caused. I think my numbness in fingers after sleeping is related to pressure on nerves from sleeping on them. As much as I hate to say it, you should see a neurologist to rule out various treatable conditions.

ALS can start with twitching as first reported symptom (as in my case) but my neurologist told me on last visit that is most often not the first reported symptom in ALS (muscle weakness is). Both my local neurologist and thr Mayo Clinic specialist said ALS is still a possibility in my case. Strangely enough my symptoms coming and going gives me hope that it is a case of BFS (bothersome but not fatal) because in ALS the progression is generally downhill with few if any upticks.
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Re: 4 months into twitching, my update

Postby jerry2 on February 8th, 2012, 12:43 pm

I am not sure because it wasn't 100%, one sedative did nothing, I got less of the "hour long twitches" after some week and after stopping sedatives they weren't back for 10 days or so. But even then there were twitches and in one foot still going strong all the time. But I think overall it was less, yes, but far from gone. But less meant my doctor it is not from ALS so start dealing with life problems not death problems.

I only hope no new scary symptom that will get my anxiety high will not turn out. In fact it did. When I stand up from bed one afternoon my right foot collapsed and I fell. I didn't feel any tingling so I thought my leg didn't fall sleep but it might anyway. Didn't return since. I though it may be foot drop but I was on sedatives, didn't worry so much as I would 1st month.

But thank you all for the kind words. Now I seem to have some kind of depression not anxiety. Fear that I will be in more and more pain, and I can not do anything about it.

BobDownSouth: I see, My pain is not like cramps most of the time but like uscular/tendon/join pain, When I don't activate the muscle it is not there, when I try to use the muscle it hurts. As I understand cramps come spontainously. I went to neuro 3 months ago, didn't find anything wrong. Yes, told me I have some atrophy in my left hand, but I found 2 year old photos with the same "atrophy". But he sure scared a lot out of me.

What does stifness mean? You mean it is hard for you to make a fist or something, is that joint stifness like in rheumatoid arthritis? I don't seem to fell stiff, I just feel the muscle/joint/tendon/ligaments pain when I want to use the muscles :-(

I am not a doctor but I've really read a lot. I have never heard of ALS patient who had stifness and leg pain etc. and now is better. So I am puzzled why the doctor told you 50:50 ALS:BFS. I can understand very much how much of a burden this must be for you :-(

PS - Today I can not hear 100% on my left ear, I though I have wax and I cleaned the ear with some solution I have for this. Clean. Still hear only 80% :-( But this can not be related to my other problems I guess... Just more wierd stuff...
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Re: 4 months into twitching, my update

Postby whatmeworry on February 8th, 2012, 2:18 pm

Hi jerry,
You seem like one of us where anxiety can be driving a significant fraction of our symtoms, at least the increaaasing pain part.

It was very brave to let your emotions out in the woods. but from first hand experience i can tell you that technique helps most only after you remove stressors for a while. it takes months to wind up the coil and just as long to unwind, in this case.
(The fun part with unrepressed emotions will be how to handle them in your adult personality, which you doc will talk about.)

From my personal experience, I do recommend antidepressants. but thats up to you and you doctor to have real medical advice.

Hang in there, things will get better. this will pass.
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Re: 4 months into twitching, my update

Postby jerry2 on February 8th, 2012, 2:32 pm

Problem is, when I am letting my emotions out I really don't solve any life problems I have. Second thing is, letting emotions out like this makes a huge immediate stress to the body I think as my body symptoms worsened last week. In fact my hand and part of the face was numbing when I yelled and cried...

I was taking Benzodiazepenes for 1 month yes. And my feet seem to be a little better (not good) and twitching a little better. I was more tired during the day but I am tired also now so I don't make a big difference.

I think taking Benzodiazepenes for more than a month is dangerous to get addicted.

You got it correctly about my adulthood. Doctor told me I am 43 years and I don't know who I am, what I want and where I would like to go. That is the problem. And he told me the problem goes from childhood where I was kind of "partner with my mother" instead of my father. And my mother controlled what I can do and can not do. So I had huge responsibility of satisfying her to be able to have peace. And then the teenage years are teenage years and the body problems started when my wife wanted a child. Doctor told me because of responsibility early in life I have responsibility problems now. I connect them to bad things, things I do not want. And the ultimate responsibility of an adult, that you can not "escape from no longer" is having children. So the doctor said I am full of anger (I just feel sadness though) etc. So yes, he told me anger is the problem with me. And that this anger comes out as tendon/muscle pain that goes around the body. This is a hard and unbelievable thing for me to believe but who am I to know... He even told me I choose to be computer programmer to get out of my emotions. So this neurological problems are just the most scary stuff that is happening to me. I've had bladder/stomach/colon/pain problems for 7 years. The fear did not dissapear as my wife wanted another child and I seem to be emotionally incapable to take care of myself. To the doctor, I have even found the wife that has her own problems also... So I HAVE problems other than my pain and twitching. But can this really cause so much body problems? Am I too much impatient for things to improve? They are geting worse :-(
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Re: 4 months into twitching, my update

Postby whatmeworry on February 8th, 2012, 2:41 pm

yah, i understand. sorry i tried to edit my post to be less knowitall but you read before i managed to change it.

I know you FEEL like things are worse when you let your emotions out but
1l this is part of your long time reasoning to make them suppressed.
2) you may have been winding up your anxiety rather than trully letting loose.

I really think SSRI medications help there.

i dont want to lecture and be a jerk, so let me just share a story.

when i first had twitchingband pain in my pelvis, it was bad and i panicked. it took over a year for me to stop panicking and only then did the symtoms improve. after 6 months of improvement, and seeing a therapist who insisted i understand what i was repressing, one day i started to throw fits. now, when I write fits, what i am talking about is getting angry. I was raised to NEVER get angry.

more below
ANGER was a sin. IF I GOT ANGRY, the ghost of John Lennon would strike me dead from a cosmic bed-in somewhere.-
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Re: 4 months into twitching, my update

Postby whatmeworry on February 8th, 2012, 2:50 pm

So anyway, having reduced my anxiety, and feeling better sometimes my wife had a dinner party with some friends. I have a love/hate relationship with dinner parties. I love the company but they make me very nervous. and now married, i had less control over the circumstances. at some point, i was out back and felt a sudden wave of anger. Why? Because i had been in physical therapy doing biofeedback to control muscle tension, and having reeducated myself to NOT immediately hide my emotion in pelvic tension, the emotion came out.

Needless to say, i was experiencing this emotion i rarely felt, (except in the officially anally sanctioned righteous indignation form) and did not have the adult coping skills to handle this foriegn feeling.

So i picked up a green plastic lawn chair and threw it against a patio wall out back. it broke. my wife still teases me about "'my first temper tantrum". But heres the thing. I was pain free for the next two days. had a great dinner party, by the way. and never looked back. so what your psychiatrist talks about is real.

It DID take me another 3 years to develop adult coping skills for anger, but my meek anger (that felt like a torrent to me) was mostly just amusing to others until i adjusted.

anyway, i could not have learned that back in the crazy, scared, tense times, when all my emotions were crunched up in a little ball of anxiety. i needed both mental stress reeduction, and physical muscle reeducation, to attain that point.

ok, ill step off the pulpit now, but please know, this willget better for you. count ont the bfs folks here to help you. i promise to be less verbose now. hang in there. you are brave to share.
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Re: 4 months into twitching, my update

Postby jerry2 on February 8th, 2012, 2:53 pm

Sorry, I can not find a description of the word fits? What are fits? You started to throw plates in the wall?

Problem is if I am angry on my mother, wife, myself, I really not do anything to solve my situation I am in. Solving situation takes "thinking" to me, but to my doctor I need to find out not what others want but what I want and stop thinking about others. He even told me my obsession with terminal ilnesses in this years (cancer, cancer, cancer, ALS) are a ways to escape from the real world, because as long as I think I am terminally ill I do nothing with my real life, it is a sort of addiction, escape, illusion to him.

I'll ask him again about antidepressants, but I was taking Zoloft 7 years ago and didn't do me any good, just make things worse. Because I have health anxiety doctor doesn't know if antidepressants will benefit or not, as I may get new symptoms because of the medication that will rise the anxiety.

Problem is doctor is so busy I can see him only once a month now :-( Well, he is so expensive I can not afford more than 2 visits a month either :-( In my country psychotherapy is not under healt care, only psychiatry (take pills and go home) is :-&

Wierd thing is under Chinese medicine I've read that this kind of problems (muscle pain, twitching, tremor, numbness, stomach and colon problems) are part of liver energy blockage. The main reson for this blockage is... you've guessed it: repressed anger :-(

This is still like science fiction to me as a computer programmer, but it makes sense in some wierd way. The truth is, I've not been to EMG, but if you look at the whole 7 years picture of me (no doctor here does though), I've had so many problems in this years and they found nothing or scared me and found nothing. And I started to believe Western type of medicine can not help me at all. My liver tests are ok, every blood test is Ok, everything should be ok, but it is not. But to Chinese, the liver energy blockage is not shown on blood tests, it is not blood blockage but energy blockage.

My problem is as a computer programmer, I would like to "fix a bug" in my body as there seem to be a bug that I am not working properlly, so my reasonable me is trying to find a "cure" to fix the bug in software. And as person is more than just body, I seem to be stuck...
jerry2
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Re: 4 months into twitching, my update

Postby jerry2 on February 8th, 2012, 3:00 pm

No need to apologise for being verbal. I guess I have the forum's longest letters record...

Pelvic tension, that sound familiar to my colon problems last year (I mean 2010). I had burning in my anus and I had NO visible problems there (did proctoscopy and colonoscopy) and nothing was seen, all ok. I did do pelvis excersises for few months then. I still get this problem, but it lasts a day or 2 not 3 months every day. I got so scared I have colon cancer back then... I really did make things worse.

I see a difference between us. I am always angry, I am not letting my anger be in me. My wife says I am a negativist, I always find something bad about everything. And I am easily get angry. But perhaps it is not "adult anger" but some other, infantile kind of anger, is this what you were trying to tell me? Because I am not a calm guy, I am allways grumpy and angry, so I though I can not let the anger in me as the doc says, as I am an easily angry guy. And I easily get hurt emotionally and then I think about it too much etc...

I guess you wanted to tell me I am still anxious, stil angry... and the symptoms can not heal in a day, it takes time...
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Re: 4 months into twitching, my update

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