Any gay & *beep* BFSers?

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Postby Christina on June 6th, 2006, 12:52 pm

Hi Tanya,

Sorry if you were offended. I hope I didn't ofend you...I made a joke re: trying to network.

Hey...someone pm'd me to ask if I was married? So much for networking. I've been married 25 years..so it might be the most pleasant thing that has happened to me in a long time


Here is where I say some of my best friends are g-ay, but actually my best friend is g-ay, a fact that I have not ever been troubled over.

You sound a bit defensive to me though, and I can certainly see why if you thought that they were being bigoted, However, asking if someone is from Austrailia because you are...and might want to find someone from the same area to meet, compare symptoms etc....is not exactly the same as asking someones sexual preference. Some might see that as just a little more personal.

Besides that, I notice that you are in New York...we have been trying to get East Coast twitchers together for a lunch or something for a while...if you would like to join us on that it would be great. We could all use a therapist too, I am sure. Hey for all I know, you might even BE my therapist.


Christina
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Postby TriJeff on June 6th, 2006, 1:26 pm

Good to hear your back around. I was beginning to wonder if you’d disappeared.

I’m still twitching but getting better in terms of spirit and moral.

I’m sorry I caused your thread to EXPLODE! – I really didn’t expect some of the reactions you’ve gotten and I hope they don’t deter you from making more posts.

We all have so many things in common on this board mainly: lots and lots of twitching!

P.S. I was once asked to leave a tavern because the small-minded bar tender suspected I was a twitcher. THIS KIND OF BIGITORY HAS TO STOP!

What I would like to find out is: Are fasciculation’s genetic, environment, or did I simply choose to fasciculate?

Isn’t anyone just a little fasciculation curious? ….hmmm?

- Jeff
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Postby 1TwitchingTherapist on June 6th, 2006, 1:56 pm

Hi Christina,

Thank you very much for your post - and I was actually not at all offended by your comment about my "networking" ..I thought that was kind of a cute comment! - Nothing wrong with networking. The comments that I had my biggest issues were from alex_als. And yes, I am absolutely offended by his comments and feel defensive about it when things of this nature are stated. I also find it hilarious that he wrote in one of his responses that he has never met a ga-y or lesbia-n person (not sure which it was, since it was bleeped :) ) That just further reinforced the ridiculousness and ignorance of his undersatnding.

Just to respond to what you said about asking one's sexual preference being more personal. -- I did not put out a question forcing people to disclose anything, nor did I take a poll of the sexual preferences of the members of AboutBFS.com. I just posted this as a topic, asking if others who identify as such wish to say hello. Yes, one's sexual orientation is more personal than what country they live in. But umm ... so what? If people post questions on the forum such as: "anybody on here afro-cuban"? or "anybody on here a grandparent?" or "anybody here struggling with an eating disorder or gambling addiction" --these things are also of a more personal nature, and valid topics - and those wishing to respond and self identify (or discuss this topic) quite simply will; and those who do not identify or wish to disclose issues related to this just won't reply. People who are members of (both visible and invisible) minority groups, often like to find and socialize with one another when in larger settings - it is a very natural human dynamic. (I guess as people with BFS, we sort of form a minority group) :).

I did not start this particular forum in order to have more "twitch talk", compare symptoms, etc ... there are plenty of forums for that (which I visit!) - This is why I posted in the "off-topic conversation" area.

Anyway, on a different note - I think that it is funny that a person messaged you asking if you were single. I am glad that you interpreted it as a compliment :) . Quite interestingly, quite a few g-ay and lesbia-n people have private messaged me after my post, sharing their stories with me - explaining that they felt uncomfortable replying to my post because of some of the negative messages posted on here and therefore felt too intimidated to 'out' themselves "publically" on this site. I completely understand them.

By the way, it's awesome that you have a close ga-y friends! I think that if more people would open up their hearts and lives to variety of all sorts, the world that we live in would be so wonderfully different.

Christina, I hope that you understand where I am coming from. I honestly took no offense to anything that you posted. It actually made me smile. I am not some angry,vengeful person - though I do become very annoyed & frustrated when I witness or experience bigotry and inequality (I usually do not have to look far :) )

On that note, I do need to go - I have a client coming in soon.

I hope that this post finds you happy and well, and I'd be happy to join in an east coast twitchers luncheon :)

All the best,
~Tanya


Christina wrote:Hi Tanya,

Sorry if you were offended. I hope I didn't ofend you...I made a joke re: trying to network.

Hey...someone pm'd me to ask if I was married? So much for networking. I've been married 25 years..so it might be the most pleasant thing that has happened to me in a long time


Here is where I say some of my best friends are g-ay, but actually my best friend is g-ay, a fact that I have not ever been troubled over.

You sound a bit defensive to me though, and I can certainly see why if you thought that they were being bigoted, However, asking if someone is from Austrailia because you are...and might want to find someone from the same area to meet, compare symptoms etc....is not exactly the same as asking someones sexual preference. Some might see that as just a little more personal.

Besides that, I notice that you are in New York...we have been trying to get East Coast twitchers together for a lunch or something for a while...if you would like to join us on that it would be great. We could all use a therapist too, I am sure. Hey for all I know, you might even BE my therapist.


Christina
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Postby Ginlyn on June 6th, 2006, 11:30 pm

Tanya,

I, too, didn't want to offend you. I could care less what you are or do with your life. But in reality, husband/wife etc., is mentioned in casual conversation. I have yet to see a post "Are there any animal lovers that twitch" or "Any West Coast people who twitch"?

Hope your twitching is getting better. It's mentally hard to deal with at times.

G.
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Postby Ginlyn on June 6th, 2006, 11:52 pm

Tanya,

After reading my post it sounded, to me, a bit cranky (which I am these days) and cold.

I only mean to say that I don't like "catagorizing" of people, whether they do themselves or someone else does it for them. I would have remarked if someone posted "Any Afro-Americans that twitch"?

Anyway, this is a free country and you are entitled to head your posts whichever way you like, just as I am entitled to make comments.

Anyway, welcome to the twitchers life, and I certainly hope your life as a twitcher will get better soon.

G.
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Postby 1TwitchingTherapist on June 7th, 2006, 9:52 am

Hiya Jeff,

I am really glad to hear that you are getting better in spirit and moral!

And I guess it is your fault that this thread exploded because you were the brave one to post an initial reply! ..hehe (just kidding).

You asked about "fasciculation curiousity" (you are too muc fun!!) .... hmm, I wonder if it's some people's own repressed fasciculation curiousity that has them responding so strongly and negatively? ;)

~Tanya

P.S. You asked some very poignant questions :) Here are my answers:

I believe that fasciculation is a mixture of genetics, predispositions, hormones, in-utero environment, and some "x-factors" that we are simply unaware of.

I just don't see how the environment can really play a very significant role - for example:

Let's say a non-fasciculator Joe goes on vacation and rooms with a couple of fasciculators. Then Joe suddenly understands the pure joys of twitching, and begins twitching himself? Nah super-unlikely - the fasciculation tendency/predisposition would have to be within Joe in order for him to not-so-much be effected by his environment (of fasciculatiors) but it's that the environment presented an opportunity for Joe's twitching tendencies to manifest themselves- which would most likely happen at some point in Joe's lifetime anyway. The if the twitch tendency is within him, it will unleash itself! Or if not, Joe would spend his life having twitching fantasies (overt or symbolic), and never truly feel happy/contect with a non-twitching lifestyle.

I strongly feel that people don't choose to fasiculate - I mean why would somebody choose to be in this often disregarded, misunderstood, mistreated minority group? Would you believe that some people even dislike or hate twitchers (they cannot possibly have met all of us)?? I guess people tell all kinds of strange tales and myths about them, which can frighten some who don't know better. Some even believe that twitching can be contagious - so they keep their children away from twitchers. But little do they know - once in a while you can spot a twitcher - but most cannot, it is often not so apparent. I am a twitcher - but I can assure you that nobody can possibly tell by looking at me. And y'know what - I am proud to be a fasciculator! I just wish that thr world was a lil more fasciculation-friendly. We are getting there ..
but s-l-o-w-l-y.

OK - I think that I may be having too much fun with this ..hehe





TriJeff wrote:Good to hear your back around. I was beginning to wonder if you’d disappeared.

I’m still twitching but getting better in terms of spirit and moral.

I’m sorry I caused your thread to EXPLODE! – I really didn’t expect some of the reactions you’ve gotten and I hope they don’t deter you from making more posts.

We all have so many things in common on this board mainly: lots and lots of twitching!

P.S. I was once asked to leave a tavern because the small-minded bar tender suspected I was a twitcher. THIS KIND OF BIGITORY HAS TO STOP!

What I would like to find out is: Are fasciculation’s genetic, environment, or did I simply choose to fasciculate?

Isn’t anyone just a little fasciculation curious? ….hmmm?

- Jeff
1TwitchingTherapist
Member
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Posts: 46
Joined: May 17th, 2006, 1:30 pm
Location: New York

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