Five months this Monday- still doubtful

[Nk904]

Yes, I have. I'm sorry I want you to see the pictures then I'll leave. How do you upload them? Another perspective would be great.

[Yuliasir]

I do not know how to post a picture here but felolows do that somehow... I think you may look in the FAQ or just upload them into any hosting and copy links in the post.
usually after that it appears that other people do not find nothing special in your hands. legs ot tongue (those are most frequently posted body parts).

[Nk904]

http://www.anxietyzone.com/index.php/to ... 21.15.html

It's there. I'm nk904.

[Yuliasir]

Did not got any picture, but look, the issue with the OCD and anxiety disorders is that you want an impossible thing: an external push or something equivalent to bring you back to stable and peaceful condition.

nope. this is impossible. this is one way road - external issues, like you relationships broken (if I understoor right) and other things one by one brought you to actual quite miserable and broken state, but the issue with the mood disorders is that you have to apply your own efforts to get stability back. The only proper external help would be acounseling not reassurance.
I'll tell you why. Becasue stress (regardless to the reasons), if prolonged, changes your brain chemisrty and neural pathways in a way that major part of information you get from outside is routed not to the frontal lobes cortex as usually but to a brain structure called amygdala. This is an ancient part of the brain used to sream ALARM! ALARM! - and that is why you behave so strange and so self-destructive (open jars, seek for atrophy in perfectly healthy hands, can not hink about anything else but your doom etc.).
This hyperexcited amygdala was confirmed in people like you and me by modernt visualisation methods so it is known for sure. Physical manifestation of that is incredibly decreased ability to think rationally. Well you still can do that but your emotional part is siezed by amygdala and rational thoughts can not lower its excitation level. Your inner PLC is a bit overheated.

The only way is to cool down. Sometimes people can do that by themselves, but not always. Natural way is to keep a strict (I mean really STRICT) schedule for a few weeks - especially in what comes to sleeping not less than 8 hours per day by whatever means (including sleeping aids), decreasing caffeine, energy drinks, other suppelements, eating more or less healthy (no diets as diet is a stress too, and emotional stress too), avoiding any medical internet searches (and fighting emotional disocfort of not being able to feed your crying and screaming amygdala), applying any method (except heavy strikes in the head) to calm down (pray, meditation, yoga, CBT, counting ships, warm bath), having some walks before the bedtime, etc.
Telling others that you have a mood disorder and are practically sick sometimes also helps. Sometimes people around demand too much of us ) and if you just tell then you are in rebuilding process and 'please do not disturb' may be helpful. And every time when your anxiety would demand to do a self-test or measure a limb or think that you are dying from ALS at your 22 - you would have to remind yourself that you are on the STRICT SCHEDULE. Give yourself 4 weeks at least - and it is quite possible that at the end of that period you would be pretty unable to think so much about your doom anyway.

If the schedule and self-limitaion of this kind does not help, then you definitely need a professional psychological help, including counseling and medication. I went through this all and I can say it really helps.

[Nk904]

Yuli, thank you so much for every word you write. I truly mean it! The pictures have to await approval and probably will be up today.

[Nk904]

Yuli here you go! http://www.anxietyzone.com/index.php/to ... 21.15.html

[Nk904]

Should be approved and page two. Also, debating a Lyme test as I've been bitten a LOT lately..

[Yuliasir]

Still can not see them. But as you are typing those therads I think atrophy may be not no. 1 ptroblem
Lime is really possible especially if you had multiple bites... but after acute phase it is hard to diagnose if you have or had it, and immunological tests are not so much conclusive as far as I see on the board. But it really may cause neuropathy (burning pains, etc.).

[Nk904]

Hmm, I guess you have I be a member to view them. Oh well. In regards to the Lyme. I was bitten last time around 5 weeks ago. The other bite has around two months ago. I don't think that's too bad considering they recommend you wait 4-6 weeks. I had my blood drawn yesterday. We shall see. Only twitchin and occasional tenderness. No buzzing or burning. Thanks as always! Have a great day, Yuli!

[mjd83]

Your story is so similar to mine it actually reassured me reading it. I remember looking up ALS and thinking that atleast I wasn't twitching! Guess what happened in my left bicep and hour later?and than my left forearm.

I officially hit the panic button, and by that night, I had twitching all throughout my legs, especially in calves, and majority left side of body. My left calf has had this twitch that looks like non stop dimples or worms crawling under the skin for 3 months now. That twitch is almost constant.

I've had 2 GPs, 3 clinical exams, and can't find a Dr. Concerned enough to refer me to a neurologists.

I had cramping in the legs for first two months, seems to mostly be gone now. Yep, I could cause them, especially in bed in morning, and sometimes I cause cramps in my toes that contort my toes.